4 Truths About Therapy, From a Therapist

What do you think about when you hear the word “therapy?” Do you see a tearful client sprawled on a couch with a blank-faced therapist cryptically writing on a yellow legal pad? Or do you think of a horror movie villain, ready to slaughter, who has no other option but to be locked in a padded room by a stern white-coated professional?

We’ve been sold a lot of exaggerations about what mental health experiences “look like,” and for a lot of people, the thought of needing help from a therapist causes confusion, embarrassment, or anger. They think that if the people around them find out they go to therapy, they’ll be labeled as “crazy,” “incompetent,” and “unstable.” They think they’ve failed at something in their lives, lost control, and can never be trusted again.

Being in the mental health field for almost a decade, I hear these things all the time. It’s like one bad rumor from years ago has spread into misinformation for generations. These exaggerated ideas from TV shouldn’t be what inform your view on therapy, much less what interferes with your decision to pursue it. So here is some insider information on what therapy actually looks like and why it’s a service that can truly be beneficial for everyone!

Your therapist can help you get a better sense of what doesn’t feel right:

Most people come to therapy after they notice symptoms of a much larger web of behaviors. For example, they may be having trouble finishing tasks at work or getting out of bed in the morning. Your therapist can help you uncover what’s making this so difficult for you, as well as what patterns or beliefs have contributed to these experiences. They may ask questions that help you get to the root of what you’re experiencing and even use techniques that involve visualizing, drawing, or games to help you gain more insight on your feelings. They may also help you learn to manage your time, communicate your needs more effectively, and manage overwhelming feelings like grief and stress, which are completely natural experiences that come with being a human!

Therapy is an honest conversation:

Your therapist is someone who doesn’t know your private life, which means they bring an unbiased perspective about situations and goals you may have. You can be completely honest about how you really feel without worrying what others think about it. They will also likely tell you some hard truths about behaviors that friends and family might not notice. It’s a myth to think your therapist will always tell you what you want to hear; they’ll more than likely help you zoom out of a dilemma and guide you through its different moving parts.

The process is completely personalized:

No two therapy sessions look alike! Each appointment is tailored to you, and you’re in charge of leading where it goes. You’ll have days where you’re feeling ready to conquer the world and want to tell your therapist about it, or days when you don’t really want to talk and would rather end the session early. There are days when you’ll want to confess things that feel too heavy inside you and days you’d rather reveal the truth of how often you binge reality TV. You are a beautiful, complex human that will feel differently every day, and your therapist will make sure to help you achieve your goals at the pace that works best for you.

We’re here for every part of you:

A therapist is present for everything you bring into the room. There is nothing too embarrassing, too shameful, to annoying to talk about. We know you’ll make mistakes and we believe in you no matter how many times they happen. A therapist is a person who creates a genuine connection with you and welcomes all you’ve had to hide: your sadness, anger, laughter, snot-faced tears, and cheesy jokes.

I invite you to give it a try! The actual experience of going to therapy is very different than what’s been painted on TV or told to us by people we know. It’s a dynamic science that’s constantly changing, meaning that the types of treatment that were provided years ago have likely evolved into something new.

This is the opportunity for you to learn more about yourself and work on becoming the person you want to be!

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